Why is it so difficult for most of us to accept praise? Think about it. When was the last time you were seriously able to say thank you when you had someone paid you a compliment? “Hey Jim, you were great in today’s call”... there’s a feeling of embarrassment or needing to be self deprecating and say “thanks… but I still suck at basketball”... Huh?
How about being confident that, yeah I did well in there and it’s because I believe in myself? I’ve realized that I’ve avoided the spotlight for years because of that. I’ve gotten praise in the past and the narrative immediate starts…
“Shit, now everyone thinks that I think I’m better then everyone. If I try too hard people won’t like me... and if people don’t like me how can I like me??... and if I don’t like me then who will? Dogs? Not cats they hate everyone. But even some dogs don’t like me either. Remember the nice German Shepard that supposedly would never barked at anyone growled at you... better make fun of myself”.
I’ve since changed that because I’ve spent a lot of time figuring out what I’m good at and where I need improvement or opportunities to grow. That self discovery and emotional intelligence is such a huge part of personal development and really helps in every facet of life: relationships, family, career, spirituality, love, etc.
This limiting self belief, it’s a big no no in personal development. The minute we don’t believe in ourselves or aren’t confident in our abilities we open the door for others to think that way as well. Who wants to fight with someone about accepting a compliment?
If I give a compliment and the person isn’t genuine about their response it makes me feel crappy that I couldn’t help them and I’m less likely to give one out again. So in a sense you are ripping off the world. If you aren’t able to believe that you are the life of the party when you ARE the life of the party then the battle is lost. No matter how much praise you get it still won’t change your opinion.
So practice receiving compliments and being grateful for them. Say “THANK YOU… I KNOW” but not in a snobby I’m better then you way. In a way that’s honest and appreciative and that brings meaning and fulfillment.
I challenge you to go out and compliment people today/this week without any expectations. See how they respond and if they beat themselves up. If they do call them out on it… in a loving way.
Let me know in the comments some examples you experience or ping me on Facebook or Instagram or Twitter.
Normal guy with comedic tendencies... introverted with extroverted tendencies... yogi with stressful tendencies... over 30 years old with under 30 year old tendencies